Off topic humor post

[Old Guy]

With some of the discussions we've had regarding WAF, I thought this might be anappropriate post:

The Harley Rider.....

A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I
will grant you one wish."

The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride
over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous
challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required to reach
the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It
will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is
hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little
more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."

The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent
treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?

[scott fitlin]

ROTFLMAO!

Drum roll please, thats funny!

[bfish]

Hilarious, O.G., Thanks!

[Davidg]

HA! LOL, Don't think another man has ever made me cry! laughed so hard my gut hurts and got tears in my eyes! That's funny stuff! I actually think God probably has a awesome sense of humor, Thanks Old Guy!

[drummerwill]

Whooa!!

[Ronald Lee]

I can relate to that myself. Really funny but true.

[scott fitlin]

A soldier being chased by the MP,s loses them for a minute and comes across a nun. He begs the nun to let him hide under her habit so that the MP,s dont catch him and send him to Iraq. Please sister, I dont want to go to Iraq, please let me hide from the MP,s. The nun says ok, and the soldier crawls up under the nuns habit. The MP,s pass, and about 5 minutes go by, the nun tells the soldier the coast is clear and its ok to come out now.

The soldier thanks the nun, and then says BTW sister, no disrespect, but you have a really nice pair of legs.


The nun says to the soldier if you had looked a little higher, you would have seen I have a nice pair of balls too. I didnt want to go to Iraq, either!

[Ronald Lee]

Originally posted by Old Guy:
With some of the discussions we've had regarding WAF, I thought this might be anappropriate post:

The Harley Rider.....

A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I
will grant you one wish."

The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride
over anytime I want."

The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous
challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required to reach
the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It
will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is
hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little
more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."

The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent
treatment, why she cries, what she <font color="red">really</font> means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy."

The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Clearified the meaning a bit.

[bfish]

Originally posted by RKLee:
<font color="red">Clarified</font> the meaning a bit.

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">

[Todd W. White]

Here's one I, who used to live in Arkansas, thought was REALLY funny (of course, that's only my opinion -

On a trip to Great Britain while he was President of the United States, Bill Clinton had a meeting with Queen Elizabeth. During that meeting he asked her, "How does one manage to run a country so smoothly?"

"That's easy," the Queen replied, "You surround yourself with intelligent ministers and advisers."

"But how can I tell whether they are intelligent or not?", asked Bill.

You ask them a riddle," she replied, and with that she pressed a button and said, "Would you please send Tony Blair in." When Blair, who was the Prime Minister at the time, arrived, the Queen said, "I have a riddle for you to answer for me -

"Your parents had a child and it was not your sister and it was not your brother. Who was this child?"

Blair replied, "That's easy - the child was me."

"Very good," said the Queen. "You may go now."

Sizing up his wife's chances in her presidential bid, and thinking back on that meeting, Bill Clinton spoke to Hillary. He said to her, "I have a riddle for you, and the answer is very important - Your parents had a child and it was not your sister and it was not your brother. Who was that child?"

Hillary replied, "Yes, it is clearly very important that we determine the answer. Can I deliberate on this for awhile?"

"Yes," said Bill, "I'll give you four hours to come up with the answer."

So Hillary called a meeting of her campaign team, from top to bottom, and asked them the riddle. But, after much discussion and many suggestions, none of them had a satisfactory answer. She was quite upset, not knowing what she would tell her husband, the former President.

As Hillary was leaving her meeting, she ran into her most formidable challenger to her presidential nomination, Barack Obama.

So she said, "Mr. Obama, can you answer this riddle for me? Your parents had a child and it was not your sister and it was not your brother. Who was the child?"

"That's seems pretty easy," said Obama, "I think the child would be me."

"Oh thank you," said Hillary. "You may just have ensured my nomination for the democratic candidate for the Presidency of the United States!"

So, Hillary went back to Bill and said, "I think I know the answer to your riddle = the child was Barack Obama!"

"No, you idiot!" shouted Bill. "The child was Tony Blair!"